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Puberty can be a difficult time for all children and their families. But for children with autism, puberty presents additional unique challenges that can have a significant impact. The physical and hormonal changes associated with this stage of life can intensify existing difficulties related to communication, social interaction, sensory processing and emotional regulation.
Puberty involves various physical changes that can be confusing for any child, but especially for those with autism:
Delayed or early onset: Some children may begin puberty earlier or later than typically expected. Whilst there isn’t a link between autism and puberty onset, a difference from their peers can lead to children feeling isolated or anxious as they compare themselves to others. You can talk about how everyone is different and going through puberty early or late doesn’t mean anything.
Understanding Changes: Some autistic children might struggle to comprehend the physical changes happening in their bodies. Clear explanations using visual aids or diagrams can help them understand these changes better. It is helpful to discuss these changes before they start happening so you can prepare your child.
Body changes: Our bodies can change a lot during puberty. Whether it’s breast and hair growth, or voice dropping and acne. It can be a lot to process and may cause extra discomfort around sensory issues. For some the feeling on hair can be incredibly uncomfortable. Needing to wear a bra can trigger sensory issues. Listen to your child and work with them to find alternatives that work for them.
Personal care and grooming: Some of these physical changes may require new routines of care and personal grooming. A child may welcome the relief of shaving if they have issues with hair, however the experience of shaving and potential razor burn can lead to a bigger sensory nightmare. It is important to support your child when they are learning to shave, especially if they have dyspraxia or issues with proprioception. Purchase various types of menstrual products to find which your child prefers. Reading social stories can help awkward conversations around the importance of hygiene during this time.
The emotional upheaval during puberty is particularly pronounced for children with autism:
Increased Anxiety: Many autistic adolescents become more aware of social dynamics and may feel heightened anxiety about fitting in. This awareness can lead to feelings of depression or loneliness.
Mood swings: Whilst puberty causes mood swings in many teenagers, the extremes of this are feel heavily by autistic young people. This might mean they happen more often or are felt at extremes ends of the emotional spectrum.
Decreased emotional regulation: As a result of their hormones changes and all these other elements of puberty, some children find it increasingly hard to regulate their emotions. This may lead to more meltdowns or shutdowns. You can help your child by exploring new self-regulation techniques, providing them with exit strategies and promoting open communication about emotions and feelings.
As children transition into adolescence:
Social Skills Development: Autistic teens may find it harder to navigate complex social situations. They might need additional support in developing social skills and understanding social norms. Comic strips to talk through social situations that are coming up or have recently happened can help teens with autism see and come up with comfortable social communication they can use in the future.
Energy levels- Like many young people, autistic teens may find they lack energy and require more sleep and rest. They may also prefer the quiet dark privacy of their room as it acts as a sensory refuge. Help them create a sensory circuit that helps them regulate their energy levels, this could be at the gym or at home and include heavy work, spinning or crashing.
Sexual urges- Teens with autism may require extra to support to understand the feelings going on in their body and appropriate responses to those feelings. Be open with them that these feelings and urges are normal but they are to be dealt with privately. These conversations can feel awkward but it is important you are a safe open space for your child to talk to. Help your child access safe material around consent, sexual health and relationships.
Supporting a child with autism through puberty involves understanding the unique challenges they face during this transitional phase. Providing clear appropriate information about what to expect, fostering emotional support, and communication are crucial steps parents can take. With the right support systems in place, autistic adolescents can navigate puberty more successfully while developing greater independence and self-awareness.
